So, you had some rough months which ended up with you losing your mind one night and cheating. Of course that you immediately realized that this was the biggest mistake of your life and regretted it but what do you do to save your relationship? You have been unfaithful and you have betrayed your partner but you’re not the only one. In fact, recent studies show that one in five Americans who are in a monogamous relationship have cheated at least once. This doesn’t mean that all those relationships ended the day after; most of them have been successfully repaired and we’ll teach you how to do that as well. There is such a thing as healthy relationship after cheating and here’s how to obtain that.
1. Don’t assume that everything is over and that your relationship is doomed. As soon as your partner finds out about the cheating, regardless of how that happens, don’t assume that everything is over. Take responsibility, recognize your fault and assume that continuing the relationship is equally possible with putting an end to it.
2. Acknowledge that you have a problem and that you are the one who caused it. You are the one who messed up and you need to accept the healing process, regardless of how long it takes. Apologize for having hurt your partner and see what it is that you need to do in order to begin the healing process.
3. Figure out the real reason of the cheating. You will probably be surprised to find out that infidelity is rarely the effect of a momentary lapse in judgement or the result of a heated attraction to somebody else. Maybe you’ve been feeling lonely in your relationship lately, maybe there is something lacking around the intimate life or maybe you’re feeling that you are not receiving back the way that you are giving?
4. Don’t talk only about the infidelity. Of course that your partner will want to hear all the details, from where and when it happened to what happened afterwards. However, you should only talk about it 15 minutes a day and then move on. Otherwise, you will both find yourselves in a toxic atmosphere that will do you a lot of harm. Talk less or talk only accompanied by a psychologist or a couples’ therapist.
5. Accept the fact that your partner needs time to heal. It might take even one year for this to happen and you need to be patient and prove that he or she can trust you again. It will be difficult, you will have moments when you’ll feel that you cannot do it anymore but if you love each other then it is worth it.
Difficult times stand ahead but as long as you have determination, patience and enough love to save the relationship you are in, then you have to fight. Fight for your loved one and for your future together, as all is not lost yet. As long as you believe and understand this, everything will be sorted out.